Starting Your BDSM Journey

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BDSM is about you learning yourself and what you makes you deviant, and connections you make along the way, while finding others who share your goals."

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Starting Your Journey

What do you want out of BDSM? If you have a certain picture in your head, find out what that involves and start seeing what exists out there for you. If you are unsure what kinks even exist check our kink list https://kinklist.deviantbound.com/ and browse online to fill in the blanks. Once you have your goals, express them when meeting others.

As you dive into BDSM, things like your BDSM Role and interest will paint the picture of who you are to others, allowing you to find the right people that will mesh with what you want out of BDSM. Your role is by far one of the most significant things in determining what doors it will open for you. As you dive deeper you may find your role changes, or your kinks change, and that is all part of the journey.

Online Journey

There are many great blogs, forums, and communities out there for BDSM. Due to BDSM being represented as sexual context, it is often against TOS of many social media services because of porn etc… This can make it problematic to find a safe place to grow BDSM community, thus many are “underground” and not visable on social media. It requires a bit of knowing sites like https://fetlife.com/ which contain the kinky side of social media.

BDSM communities (Images, Memes, Education, Blogs)

  • Our website is great starting place for educational material.
  • Twitter is a common platform within the BDSM community, with a lot of resources, memes and imagery/videos.
  • Tumblr was once a golden era of BDSM content, it has had a resurgence that could be worth looking into.
  • Facebook is still a popular method for gatherings, though not always clearly defined.
  • Reddit has plenty of BDSM content, if you want to see what is around without getting too deep.

Online Spaces

  • Reddit https://www.reddit.com/r/BDSMcommunity/
  • Reddit https://www.reddit.com/r/BDSMAdvice/
  • Reddit https://www.reddit.com/r/BDSMpersonals/

Dynamic Focused (Education/Questions)

  • Reddit https://www.reddit.com/r/domspace/
  • Reddit https://www.reddit.com/r/submissive/

Female Focused (Education/Questions)

  • Reddit https://www.reddit.com/r/FemdomCommunity/
  • Reddit https://www.reddit.com/r/gentlefemdom/

Partner & Local Community

  • Fetlife https://fetlife.com/

The most accessible way to see what exists for BDSM in your community is through sites like fetlife.com, which let you search for events based in your area. This can be a great way to make connections with people. Fetlife specifically, lets you see who is attending, so you can decide if it’s a vibe you like or not by checking people’s profiles first.

Consider googling your local city/state and see if websites exist for munches, dungeons and BDSM events/education. Due to the nature of BDSM, much of the scene is not public and requires being involved already in your community, if you don’t see anything that is sometimes to be expected. Fetlife is the recommended path to get involved for beginners if you seek getting deeper into your local BDSM community. That said, you don’t have to formally join BDSM local events, many practice BDSM with their own partners pushing/learning together when starting out and that is totally acceptable/common as well.

Meeting Others

  • Reddit - https://www.reddit.com/r/BDSMpersonals/
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